Top 10 Best & Worst Jessica Alba Movies
20.08.11 # Top Ten # 12 Comments
The 5 best, and 5 worst, Jessica Alba movies. Spy Kids: All the Time in the World is out this weekend and finds Alba’s career coming full circle, as the actress who first made her name as an ass-kicker on TV show Dark Angel is once again back in action-mode, this time playing a super-capable secret agent. Here’s our analysis of this thespian’s career, starting with the Best 5…
5. Idle Hands (1999)
Even if you subscribe to the view that Alba is blander than a cardboard sandwich, there really is no disputing that the actress is a sterling physical specimen of femininity (as they are wont to say in Maxim), a fact which has resulted in her often being cast as the archetypal ‘pretty girl’.
And that was the role she took in underrated horror-comedy Idle Hands, with her Molly serving as object of desire for Devon Sawa’s Anton and object of murderous intent for Anton’s demonically-possessed right hand. Jessica Alba, incidentally, is left-handed. Fact!
4. Into the Blue (2005)
Belying its lousy critical rep, this Bahamas-set thriller can boast decently-shot underwater sequences, sharks, shipwrecks and the always-good-value Josh Brolin on bad guy duties. What more could you ask for? Jessica Alba in a bikini? All yours, my friend…
3. Fantastic 4: Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007)
Admittedly, Fox’s first Fantastic 4 film was a bit of a calamity, with ‘world’s smartest man’ Reed Richards coming over as the kind of dullard who couldn’t tie his shoelaces without making an international incident of it, and arch-villain Doctor Doom making out like a tedious, tin-plated jerk.
But the sequel was a definite improvement, with the early scenes successfully capturing some of the fun of the classic Lee ‘n’ Kirby source comic books. Alba’s Invisible Woman was more pro-active this time round too, as she shifted from empty-headed tug-of-love trophy to key human contact for cosmic cube-gleamer, the Silver Surfer.
2. Sin City (2005)
A box office hit which undoubtedly helped get 300 and, by extension, Watchmen off the starting blocks (The Spirit too, more miserably), Robert Rodriguez’ Sin City is still a maddeningly unbalanced movie, with the film noir tropes which were given new life in comic book form by Frank Miller becoming largely pointless and ineffectual when regurgitated back onto the big screen from whence they came.
However the last of the three main story shards, That Yellow Bastard, also proved by far the best, with Alba’s angelic dancer, Nancy, serving as a sympathetic presence in a sordid, violent, but involving tale.
1. The Killer Inside Me (2010)
If Sin City was a darkly lurid affair, then what to make of this controversy-courter from British director Michel Winterbottom? A raw portrait of cruel, casual brutality, conversely shot with tremendous style, the two main actresses, Alba and Kate Hudson, both belie their reputations for starring in brainless fluff with committed, convincing turns as the lovers of psychotic deputy Lou Ford (a brilliant Casey Affleck).
Be forewarned though, the early scene in which Ford pulverises Alba’s Joyce is as gruelling viewing as anything you might see this side of one of Gaspar Noé’s feel-bad endurance tests.
Her Worst 5 >
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Did I read this wrong? There are five ‘best’ movies from her?
She’s made more movies in the last ten years than Judi Dench. Therefore she is the better actress.
Should Machete be on the best or worst list, I can’t decide.
i thought she was pretty decent in Awake, with Anikin Skywalker
You should definitely include Paranoid to the list of worst movies!
I can’t beleive what I’m reading. Rise of the silver surfer is among her best ? You’ve got to be kidding.
Well… it was quite a limited field.
The love Guru! Mike Meyer’s finally achieved exact feel of a late 1960s pseudo-sex comedy starring Peter Sellers. Not one good joke, a production design so garish I can sill see it when I close my eyes to this day and that horrible bowel exploding feeling of being mesmerized by the shear force of it’s awfulness.
The thing about Jessica Alba is that she looks great but is too bland to carry a movie. If you saw her in a bit part you’d think, ‘that’s a saucy strumpet’. But as a star she could easily upstaged by a lamp.
I actually put Megan Fox above her as far as talent goes. Not that’s saying much. Both are in the biz cause of their looks. I’m OK with that, just don’t expect me to take you seriously
Megan Fox has no talent what-so-ever.
jessica alba is in this biz for her looks alone, now i am NOT complaining, however she does have talent she is just put into crappy roles
and by the way dane cook is awesome!
Good luck chuck waz a veri niz movie. Xpected it to be in her best 5.
I love how you spell.
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